Comments on: unsupportive friends

By: Neva Marjory

Neva Marjory — Tue, 29 Jun 2004 04:00:06 +0000

Hi, I only had one friend who has been negative
about my surgery. She keeps telling me how "unhealthy"
I’m going to be. Funny thing is, she’s the one on
multiple medications for weight related problems. I’m just
on vitamins! Look, if you’ve done your research
you’re in great shape. Don’t your friends want what’s
best for you? They’ve just not educated enough on the
surgery themselves, so share with them. All of my other
friends have been great and encouraging. I think once
your friends see the weight come off and you’re health
improve, they’ll come around. And if they don’t, then were
they really you’re friends?

Pam

By: Neva Marjory

Neva Marjory — Mon, 28 Jun 2004 11:57:44 +0000

I’m glad you realize that these people are not as
wise as they try to appear to be. First of all, taking
diet pills is not the answer. They can cause you many
harmful side effects. We have done our homework and with
WLS it will be a very useful tool for weight loss and
also help with the many other problems that accompany
overweight people. Don’t let them bother you — I think they
are actually jealous that you have a direct plan that
will help solve the problem, not just a temporary fix.

By: Neva Marjory

Neva Marjory — Mon, 28 Jun 2004 06:36:57 +0000

Believe me, I know what you mean. I also have one
friend that is really against it, and she is also
overweight. She says what about your husband, isn’t it going
to be hard for you to cook for him and not eat it
and won’t it be hard if he eats something in front of
you that you really like. My husband is a very
considerate person and he would not do that, and my friend is
very old fashioned and waits on her husband all of the
time. I am not like that and my husband does not expect
me to be. He even said, " do people think I can not
fend for my self, I was single until I was 28" . Don’t
worry Brandy, I am sure everyone will change when they
realize how much healthier and happier you are. Stacy

By: Neva Marjory

Neva Marjory — Mon, 28 Jun 2004 01:16:10 +0000

I have been between a size 4 and 6 for the past six years. I was 263 lbs on
surgery day

By: Neva Marjory

Neva Marjory — Sun, 27 Jun 2004 19:55:22 +0000

I went through a similar event some years after
the surgery. I was meeting with a group of executives
from my company, and it happened to be the day that
the girl from the group Wilson-Phillips had her
surgery televised. A very thin size 7 VP in my group
starts ranting about how hideously stupid it was for
anyone to have surgery to lose wait. She said she had no
respect for fat people who couldn’t just "put down the
fork." I told her that she not of what she spoke and
then asked her if she respected me. Her answer was yes
of course, and I proceeded to tell her very proudly
that I had the surgery in 1994, and that I am very
comfortable with my decision to do so. I also told her if the
solution she provided was so easy and cut and dry, why
isn’t everyone in the world the same size. I then sked

her that if someone told her at 4pm this evening that
she had to stop loving and having something she has
lived with or depended on all of her life, like a
child, a parent, or a spouse, would she be able to "put
her heart down or away?" Keep looking up honey, and
find the support in people who really care for you.
The other ones really don’t matter.

Much
Success in the "future you," and the current beautiful
spirit you already possess.

By: Neva Marjory

Neva Marjory — Sun, 27 Jun 2004 14:34:35 +0000

I am at work right now and I just got done
talking to a friend of mine. We only have about 35
employees that work here so we are all pretty close. They
all pretty much know what I’m doing, but they all
have mixed feelings about it. My friend was just
telling me that they were all talking about me in the
break room..GREAT..i’m glad i’m the conversation piece.
One person, my boss doesn’t know why I’m doing it,
she hates it and tells me so everytime I say
something about it. I finally stopped talking about it
around her. This other person knows someone that has
lost a lot of weight on diet pills and doesn’t see why
I don’t just get them and try before I do something
sooooo drastic. I’m really sick of hearing that. Don’t
they think I know what I’m doing. It’s my body that is

going to be getting cut open, not theirs. I’ve gotten
to the point where I just don’t talk about it
anymore. At least not here. I really thought they would be
more supportive than they have been. They think they
are, but really what they are saying is not making me
feel good.
Just thought I would throw my two cents
in.
It’s amazing how sooo many people think they
know what it takes to lose weight. They should try to
sell their ideas if they think they are so good!just
joking here…:)

By: Neva Marjory

Neva Marjory — Sat, 26 Jun 2004 17:11:26 +0000

Hi Gaygoalie!!!

Brenda here! I have often
observed that most of the unsupportive behaviour that
accompanies this surgery is due to a lack of knowledge and
fear.

Show your friends these support sites.
Take them to obesity.com

Maybe if they are open
to the information, you can allay these fears. They
care about you and your safety, and above all else
they have to learn to respect your decision.

Take Care!

Brenda